Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Boon and the bane

My day of blindness…. (Make that half a day)

It simply started out as a lazy day where my lil bundle of terror (in the form of my kitten) woke me up with her clawing away at my hand, out of hunger. The simple solution was to drag her away and thrust her at my dad, who takes better care of her than he has ever bothered for me (sad to say). Ah, back to my cozy bed for a few more hours of sleep.

A lazy stretch after waking and getting ready, I walked out to my mum, whose delicious coffee my (mind more like) taste buds were itching for, only to have my kitten. Christened ladoo, throw herself at my ankle and gnaw away at my jammies. Cute.

Cursing my cable provider for ruining my life, and driving it to complete boredom by cutting off any channel that gave solid information, I turned to my computer as usual for solace. I blared my favorite list on the speakers and checked mail etc. Alas that didn’t keep me occupied for too long. Oh yeah I remembered I had to take my bike out to service. Going down I pestered dad to take me to the ophthalmologist, cos of the trouble my eye was giving me.

Driving has always given me immense pleasure, a sense of power and freedom. I’m still waiting for the day I buy my first Bike. Hmmm…. Anyways, he was very particular about dropping my scooter off before heading to the doc. At the time I thought he was just being stubborn as usual! Little did I know why he insisted on it at the time.

My newfound ophthalmologist is a retired professor from a well-known college here.
And going to him was less a visit to the doctor and more a visit to your old grandpa.
Well, chortling away his joke about my age he made me take the usual reading tests.
All the way through except for the last line…. Dang.

Then came the shocker that I didn’t react outwardly to. Dilating my pupils. Yikes. The last time I had to undergo this torture the dratted doctor ( the old supposed doc who I went to before grandpa ^o^) diagnosed me for the wrong power and almost ruined my eyes ( given cos of my obstinacy about not wearing the dorky glasses I had picked out, I saved my eyes!) and it gets better. He practically blinded me for two days.

Everything was blurred. I knew where I was going, what I was seeing. But nothing had a definite shape. And this was around 6 years ago people when I had lesser life than I do now. I couldn’t do anything… not even TV! (sob).

This time around it wasn’t so bad. I could see everything…. Everything far off that is. He had diagnosed me for distance vision, thereby completely obscuring everything within a foot around me.

That was when I realized the pain it was to be blind. I know its exaggeration, but hey this made me realize a lot. The time I spent sitting there waiting for the medicine to dilate my pupils, I couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t move, I couldn’t use my phone, I had no idea of who was and wasn’t in the room. Not even if my own dad was there still. In the time that I was sitting there, I thought of the things that I really wanted to see then. I so badly wanted to see the bikes and cars out on the street. I wanted to see my dad’s bike. I wanted badly to be able to type out a message to my friends on my phone despite being charged for it. I wanted to call my mum and tell her that we would be delayed cos of the tests that I was to take.

Nothing. I wanted badly to see the face of my scrawny little kitten as she bounded up to me to attack my leg, to see her scratching away at my feet, and then stare up at me with those cute big green eyes as though she was an innocent angel. I wanted to go right out to my computer and draw out my most favorite character in my story. I wanted to see all the colors I thought were just so beautiful, marvels of life. I even had the urged to pick up my textbook for Physics of Materials and read through it.

Then did I realized how many things in my life I enjoyed merely because of my sight.

The things I had taken for granted. The things I was able to do independently all because I was blessed with near perfect sight (come on people I can see a bus at the end of the road and tell you what it say, who cares what the doc says!). I am able to do everything.

Groom myself to my satisfaction; get around to wherever I want. I have the option of choosing what I want to and don’t want to see. I have the option of seeing what the world is like, be it biased or even if I’m seeing just a fraction of it. I am able to express my creativity with color because I have vision. I realized how important color and shapes were in my life…. And the same extrapolates to everything to do with me.

My music defines me and I know now for fact that without being able to listen to my songs on the mp3 player my sister so lovingly bought me, as the drab journey to my university back and forth lolls on, I’d become mad instantly.

Yes it was for merely half a day I spent visionless…. But then the smallest interval of time is enough to make one realize what it is he has and what he is taking for granted.

I know for sure without my vision, hearing and speech I’d have gone mad. I understood what Helen Keller was trying to tell us. I found it terribly difficult for a day, I can only imagine what it is like to go through life, for those unfortunate souls who don’t have these faculties.

Seriously, you don’t know what you’ve had till its gone… don’t let that be. I’ve learnt that now, in half a day of blindness.


Dwarak said...

Good realization!! Many times we don really know the good things we have around us.. btw welcome to my blogosphere!!

Acushla said...

pretty nice!

Karthick said...

It's so nice.But,It's always good to be in the dark when you are surrounded by evil...